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Fundy

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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Sun Dec 06, 2015 3:03 pm

Xid wrote:
alldatndensum wrote:
I think I am seriously gonna call myself:  Chris Dickens & D'Bare Bones Band.
I like it!
Me too.  That gets my vote!

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rockerVu2

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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Mon Dec 07, 2015 9:44 am

Quote :
I don't seem to be able to FIND people in day to day life with the same interests.
that's my problem too.

Quote :
I think I am seriously gonna call myself:  Chris Dickens & D'Bare Bones Band.
That name gets my vote too.

Quote :
I may try to release a 2 song EP for only a buck to introduce my new project.

I'll love this idea. I'm curious to give both songs a listen.

I see you have made plans, and you have not given it up.
I admire you for this.
Thumbs Up Thumbs Up Thumbs Up
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Dynamis

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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Thu Dec 10, 2015 10:28 pm

I know I am late in responding to this thread and understand that a lot that needs to be said has already been said.  However, I would still like to respond but without offering a lot of 'empty platitudes' at the same time.

Ultimately, what I find encouraging is that a lot of us here are struggling with many of the same issues and/or face many of the same challenges.

Quote :
I am disgusted with making music as I just don't seem to have the ability to play what I hear in my head.  Even if I do, I'll never find a band to play it.  Before you encourage me to have hope, 12 years is long enough.  I am done hoping.  It ain't happening, folks.

Is there anyone within the music industry that you might be able to reach out to for advise?  Perhaps someone along the lines of Glenn Kaiser or Dale Thompson who have previously made music along similar lines (that I believe) you are attempting to record. Or at the very least is there a music production message board that you might frequent for insight and critique?

I know this is easier said than done, but if I get frustrated with a matter I find it helpful to set things aside for an extended period of time and then revisit them with a fresh mindset and perspective.

BTW, I like the moniker Chris Dickens & D'Bare Bones Band.  It fits quite nicely.


Quote :
I am disgusted with myself for putting back on nearly 30 pounds after losing it two years ago.  Why keep trying if I am just gonna blow it again and again?

I made some changes to my diet the first half of November and managed to lose roughly 10 pounds.  However, over the Thanksgiving holiday I went on an eating rampage and gained it all back.  I have returned to the old diet and hope to be seeing results in the near future.


Quote :
I am disgusted with not having any friends outside of message boards.  I seriously have no one other than my wife that I can spend time.  I am lonely and feel like there is something wrong with me for being unable to find friends or keep them.

This is a concern that has been posted by more than one member of the CHM community- about having no friends outside the internet and I concur.  It is truly difficult to make new friends in this day and age, let alone keep the ones you manage to make.

On a personal note, I discovered the Christian hard music scene in the early eighties but did not meet anyone with similar musical tastes until after the turn of the century when I got online and joined many of the Christian metal related message boards at the time (and still exist to this day).  Obviously, what draws us together here as friends is both similar tastes in music but sharing the same faith as well.

It kind of reminds me of Romans 1:12, which speaks of being 'mutually encouraged by each others faith'.

If I do not have friends outside the internet, it is partially my fault in that I do not make enough attempt to go out and meet people.  Working full time and running Angelic Warlord (which can seem like a full time job in itself) does not allow for much in the way of a social life.  The only possible social outlet I have is joining a singles group at a local church, something I have never felt particularly comfortable with- so I kind of feel like a square peg in a round hole when it comes to church attendance.  Speaking of which...


Quote :
I am disgusted with losing more and more people from my church as we transform into an old person church with no hope of survival.  We're stuck in the 1950's and most of the older generation likes it that way.  I hate watching the 40 and under check out and leave.  They are leaving but they aren't going elsewhere.  We've hit an iceburg and no one seems to notice that we are sinking fast.

Back in the mid-nineties as a younger person I could be placed within the same group of the '40 and under that checked out and left but did not go elsewhere'.  I went into more detail about this in the Childhood thread from several months ago so no need to discuss further.

That said, I tried desperately to find a 'home church' but it was all in vain.  Looking back I got frustrated due to the inability to find a positive church environment based upon the compassion for and acceptance of other people.  I also was not the most mature person spiritually at the time and (again in looking back) found myself in some spiritually immature environments and rubbing shoulders with people who (similar to myself) were not exactly the most spiritually mature.  The problem was that due to my spiritual immaturity I was not able to discern a spiritually immature environment from a mature one.  Does that make sense?

In the Secular/Christian/Secular thread I outlined what in my opinion are three traits of spiritual maturity and thought I would repeat them here (without proselytizing or coming across heavy handed):

1.  Understanding how love is impartial
2.  Understanding that faith equates to hard times
3.  Understanding the importance of grace in the face of weakness

I have read online about attempts to get the 'millennial generation' to go or to return to church with trappings such as having an espresso shop at church, more contemporary worship. etc.  While none of that is bad in of itself, the factor I find missing is compassion.  Really, what I look for in a 'home church' is one based more around kindness towards and compassion for the individual, which begins and ends with church leadership itself.

I do not intend to come across heavy handed but I thought it would be helpful to share some thoughts from one of those that 'checked out and never went elsewhere'.
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alldatndensum
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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Thu Dec 17, 2015 7:28 am

I'm trying to overcome my funk a bit.  I finished my new Christmas song and have submitted for the Cigar Box Nation free compilation this year.  I am also sending it to the Dr. Demento Show like I did last year.  If accepted on both of these, I would be ecstatic!

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alldatndensum
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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Thu Dec 17, 2015 6:13 pm

I got my songs submitted to Dr. Demento, but he had already put together his final Christmas show for 2015.  He said that he would put them in a folder for review for next December.  At least that isn't a "no".  You will still hear them on the Cigar Box Nation compilation coming out very soon as a totally free download.

Pray for those of us struggling with our weight.  I have just let myself go and am about to start having to buy larger clothes again after purging most of them last year.  I need a huge God sized intervention!!!

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Staybrite

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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Thu Dec 17, 2015 7:12 pm

alldatndensum wrote:

Pray for those of us struggling with our weight.  I have just let myself go and am about to start having to buy larger clothes again after purging most of them last year.  I need a huge God sized intervention!!!

Me too sadly,  I am almost 10 pounds over my heaviest previous weight.

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Dynamis

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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Thu Dec 17, 2015 7:43 pm

Same here- the past couple weeks I have been on an (almost) steady diet of whole grains, fruits and vegetables and lean meats and have not seen any results.  Perhaps I need to exercise more or simply stay on the diet and let the results take care of themselves
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Xid

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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Thu Dec 17, 2015 9:20 pm

Cut out the whole grains, especially wheat and don't worry about the meat being lean.  Eating fat in meat doesn't add weight.  But be careful with processed meats.  A lot of the additives are anti-weight loss.
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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Fri Dec 18, 2015 7:10 am

Staybrite wrote:
alldatndensum wrote:

Pray for those of us struggling with our weight.  I have just let myself go and am about to start having to buy larger clothes again after purging most of them last year.  I need a huge God sized intervention!!!

Me too sadly,  I am almost 10 pounds over my heaviest previous weight.


I am still 30 below my highest, but that's twenty some odd up from my lowest.  I am sick feeling all the time and just sluggish.  I ache most of the time and not just my back.  All of my joints.  I feel like i am 80 and just don't like this anymore.  I don't believe that this honors God and I need a change.  This is one area where I have been feeling pretty low and have been condemning myself for some time.

I have started reading the book "The Daniel Plan".  It is part spiritual guide and part medical as well to help people overcome their sin issue with food.  With as much as I have been eating, I know that I am both an addict and a sinner.  I need off this merry-go-round once and for all.

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Dynamis

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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Fri Dec 18, 2015 9:21 am

Currently eating a breakfast of green grapes, cantaloupe slices slices and carrot sticks.  Once I get to work later this morning, I plan to top it off with a bowl of All Bran cereal (dry without milk).

What are everyone's thoughts on starting a weight loss thread in which we can encourage one another in this regard?
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kerrick

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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Fri Dec 18, 2015 11:51 am

Dynamis wrote:
Currently eating a breakfast of green grapes, cantaloupe slices slices and carrot sticks.  Once I get to work later this morning, I plan to top it off with a bowl of All Bran cereal (dry without milk).

What are everyone's thoughts on starting a weight loss thread in which we can encourage one another in this regard?

I actually already did (kind of).

http://www.christianhardmusic.com/t7083-fed-up-documentary-about-obesity-in-america
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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Fri Dec 18, 2015 4:34 pm

All who stuggle with weigth problems can count on my prayers.
Be strong , you can do this.

Have you thought about walking to lose some weigth?

I know around Christmas it's not eay to think what to eat.
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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Fri Dec 18, 2015 5:16 pm

Dynamis wrote:
Currently eating a breakfast of green grapes, cantaloupe slices slices and carrot sticks.  Once I get to work later this morning, I plan to top it off with a bowl of All Bran cereal (dry without milk).

What are everyone's thoughts on starting a weight loss thread in which we can encourage one another in this regard?



I like it.  I think that most of us will forget about the thread about the video.  I think we should start an all new thread in here so that those of us who struggle with this can get encouragement and hopefully get free forever.

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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Sat Dec 19, 2015 4:00 pm

Quote :
What are everyone's thoughts on starting a weight loss thread in which we can encourage one another in this regard?

That's an excellent idea Dynamis.
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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Tue Dec 22, 2015 5:48 pm

I cannot stress enough to anyone dealing with needing to lose some weight = KILL THAT SUGAR ! Most everyone knows my story of cutting sugar out of my diet, beit sugary foods or just foods that break down to high sugar content.  It changed my life people. Within 4 months I'd lost 30 pounds ! And that without exercising at all. 

You want to feel better ?  Have more energy ?  Lose weight quickly without exercising ?  DROP THE SUGAR !  (and it should go without saying, but, KILL THE FAST FOOD joints ! My philosophy is this: If I am overweight by even just 10 pounds, I DO NOT belong in any fast food places whatsoever ! When I got back to an ideal weight within 6 months, I would eat junk food as a once in a great while treat - I'm talking only once a month.) 

I'll be glad to tell you how I did it if you want.  It wasn't that difficult once you get past the first couple weeks of sugar withdrawal. Then change your snacking habits, monitor what kind of breads you eat (Whole Grain breaks down slower and is actually recommended for diabetics who can't have sugar), replace all those horrible sugary sodas AND the diet sodas that are like drinking poison... and so on.

My testimony is strong from just changing my diet.  My constant day and night depression faded and it was like a fog lifted, I wasn't tired all the time anymore, my energy returned, and best of all I lost weight and probably added some months or years to my life.
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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Tue Dec 22, 2015 6:00 pm

Dropping fast food is so hard to do, especially when the stuff they call "good nutritional" food looks more like slop
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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Tue Dec 22, 2015 7:47 pm

I was a huge fast food junkie for a couple decades !  
5 out of 7 days a week I ate at least one meal out, and many days I'd do breakfast and lunch at Carl's, Jack in the Box, Sonic, etc.  
I also pounded down 2 Red Bulls per day,
kept a bag of M&Ms and/or Skittles going at all times,
had about 3 Starbucks per week, 
once or twice a week I'd have those Little Debbie's snacks or Snicker bars,
I never drank water, instead I had coffee for breakfast and cokes for lunch and dinner.

Add together, stir inside body, let sit and watch body slowly DIE !!

I couldn't believe how bad I was treating my body until I dropped ALL of it on New Years of 2010. Now that I've been OFF of all that crap for so long, just the thought or smell of any junk food makes me nauseous.  Thank God I got off all that !
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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Tue Dec 22, 2015 7:56 pm

Guilty/Forgiven wrote:


I couldn't believe how bad I was treating my body until I dropped ALL of it on New Years of 2010. Now that I've been OFF of all that crap for so long, just the thought or smell of any junk food makes me nauseous.  Thank God I got off all that !

So how do you eat when you are out in public and need something quick?

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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Tue Dec 22, 2015 8:00 pm

Guilty/Forgiven wrote:
I cannot stress enough to anyone dealing with needing to lose some weight = KILL THAT SUGAR ! Most everyone knows my story of cutting sugar out of my diet, beit sugary foods or just foods that break down to high sugar content.  It changed my life people. Within 4 months I'd lost 30 pounds ! And that without exercising at all. 

Again, how do you do that? Sugar is in everything. You wouldn't be able to eat much of any prepackaged food. BBQ sauce, ketchup, Spaghetti sauce, Teriyaki sauce, nearly all bread etc. all of it has sugar in it. I'm sorry man I just can't eat salad with no dressing for 3 meals a day.

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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Wed Dec 23, 2015 12:03 pm

They even put sugar in milk as an effort to get people to buy more milk these day.  Between hidden sugars and then all the hormones used in meats, it is almost impossible to eat truly healthy without growing yourself.  I don't have the property or the time to do that.

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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Wed Dec 23, 2015 6:10 pm

Before my diet I was eating TONS of junk food, but that's not ALL I ate - 
same when I went on my diet, I began to eat and drink healthier alternatives to sugar and junk, but I wasn't 100% sugar free (cuz quite frankly, it's rather impossible to remove all sugar)

Quote :
So how do you eat when you are out in public and need something quick?
I choose places like Subway -not "health food" per se, but much better than Burger King. I rarely run into situations where I need to grab something quickly, and if I needed to, I'd try to find the best options on the menu. Even McDonald's has Whole Grain buns on chicken sandwiches that have less calories than a burger (as one example). If everyone wanted to go to say, Del Taco, I'll have Del Taco. It's a treat now, rather than a daily thing for me. And even then, I'll choose something off the menu that is more healthier than say, a 14 pound burrito with everything on it.   Laughing Fast food should only be a treat - not every week either. I went from everyday to once or twice a month now.
Lots of places have diabetic friendly options on their menus - USE THEM. The food STILL tastes great, but it's so low in sugar that you're enjoying a meal out without the guilt. AND you'll feel better later. Look at the menu's nutritional values sometime, you'll freak out !  The calories and sugars in just one meal is MORE than the recommended daily amount for an entire day's worth of meals !  There are alternatives on menus that are much more reasonable. Lisa and I both are VERY in tune to these numbers when we go out.

This isn't for everyone. In my case, I was desperate. I felt like I was dying, and was sick as a dog for months and months. When Lisa showed me this special no-sugar diet for my Dysautonomia, I jumped in with both feet, not expecting much change. But being desperate, I tried it, and I thank God I did ! 

Quote :
Again, how do you do that? Sugar is in everything. You wouldn't be able to eat much of any prepackaged food. BBQ sauce, ketchup, Spaghetti sauce, Teriyaki sauce, nearly all bread etc. all of it has sugar in it. I'm sorry man I just can't eat salad with no dressing for 3 meals a day.

I'll have to give you excerpts from my Dysautonomia book that outlines how to eat "low sugar meals". I would never say NO sugar, rather just CUT the sugar. 
Yes, sugar IS in everything... so when you eat healthy, your body is getting a normal amount of daily sugar. Problem with America is this: we are consuming 1000 times the daily average for sugar every day and then wonder why they feel like crap and are 100+ pounds overweight. Our bodies weren't designed to take in that much !     

The whole idea of eating just salads with no dressing 3 meals a day is what most people think of when being told to diet. But that's NOT what it means to truly diet and cut sugar out.
I ate, and still eat, meat, burgers, french toast with sugar free syrup, bacon and eggs, potatoes, as well as lots of great snacks and sugar free sodas that taste great ! 

It boils down to this - Do you want to lose weight and feel better ? Do you want to avoid all the severe food-born health problems that I've seen hundreds of patients struggle with in my 30 years in the medical field ? Do you want to live to see your grandkids grow up ?

If yes, then hear me out.  You DO NOT have to eat salads every day, you do not have to give everything up and eat healthy crap that tastes like sawdust, you don't have to spend all your money on diet plans and books and stuff that never works anyways (and if you DO lose some weight, you'll just gain it back again... unless you follow my diet).
My diet has become a lifestyle for me. And once I lost all the weight and my body began to heal itself of all the damage I caused over 40 years of negligence, I now treat myself to an OCCASIONAL fast food meal, a starbucks, and even a bite or 2 of some candy. Even though I eventually lost the craving for that junk, it's still cool to snag a burger every once in a while. I can DO that now, since I lost the weight... and not feel bad, or not be perpetuating my current weight gain.
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MikeInFla

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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Thu Dec 24, 2015 11:17 am

alldatndensum wrote:
They even put sugar in milk as an effort to get people to buy more milk these day.  Between hidden sugars and then all the hormones used in meats, it is almost impossible to eat truly healthy without growing yourself.  I don't have the property or the time to do that.
Do you have a Fresh Market or Farmer's Market in your area? Best place to find farm grown stuff. I have been trying to cut the sugar lately and it is hard because it is EVERYWHERE. I picked up 2 boxes of Quaker Oatmeal - one called Raisin & Dates, the other Brown Sugar "weight control". Made the Brown Sugar oatmeal yesterday and while I was eating it I was looking at the box... It has more sugar, more fat and more calories than the other box that ISN'T "weight control"!! What's up with that??? 

At work we have a fitness center. I try to use it as much as I can. I go a minimum of 3 miles on the elliptical machine. Granted, it isn't the same as hitting the pavement for 3 miles but since I have a heel spur I have to use this because it is low impact on knees and feet. 

And I know most people feel they cannot afford a fitness center, I am lucky to have access to a free one at work that is very nice. But, if you have a Planet Fitness in your area they are open 24/7 and cost TEN dollars a month with no commitments. I don't know where you live in Middle Tennessee but they have several locations in that area, try one out for a month if you don't like it you're only out 10 bucks. 

I HATE the elliptical machine. It is hard. But I also need it. Try one out, your knees will thank you for it. Go slow at first, I didn't just jump on one and go 3 miles the first time I did it. (FYI - I am not losing weight like I want but I am steady. I am around 212 and want to be 185. June of 2014 I was 212 and got to 192... Stopped working out and went back to 212 in the summer of 2015. I seem stuck there at the moment so I need to cut out the sugar). 

Funny you mention church not keeping anyone -- we have one we attend that is young and alive (we changed churches earlier this year, not because of a lack of 40 and under but because they were so snotty. A church full of rich snobs and the middle school girls did not treat my older daughter very well -- she had a couple of friends but many of them were not Christlike at all towards her.... Luckily, she is like me and does not care what other people think of her because I was the same way at that age). We love where we are now, my kids love it. But earlier this morning (before reading this thread) I decided to visit my childhood church's website. We had a nice size youth group of around 20-25 regulars when I was in high school (mid and late 80's). All of the guys listened to the same music, which was metal. I had tons of friends and a youth pastor to discuss Christian Metal with. We played all the music on every trip and bought all the latest Intense and Pure Metal releases. It was great for me spiritually and socially. The year after I graduated the youth pastor burned out and resigned. Immediately the youth dropped off like flies (by this time I was in the college age group and there were only about 5 of us). They waited a long time before hiring a new youth minister but the damage had been done. Later I found out from my dad that they (upper decision makers) forced out the youth pastor and did him wrong. To this day they have not recovered. Only 2 people that are my age that attended when I did are still there. BOTH of them are the senior pastor's daughters, once of whom I briefly dated when we were in high school (and they say never date a pastor's daughter because they are mean as snakes -- I agree!). Anyway, I visited their website and saw a video section. They record the services and post them on YouTube. The service is the same now as it was in 1990. The SAME people are in the choir but they are 25 years older and there are fewer of them. They are still playing the same worn out hymns they played when I was there. There (appearing to me anyway) was no one in the choir under the age of 65. I watched the entire service and it was as if I was watching a video from 1990. Same people, same songs, same sermon, same jokes. They have not changed one bit. My parents no longer attend there because my dad says they refuse to change (my dad is in his 70's). I am confident if I still lived in Knoxville I would have left that church long ago (no hostility at all, just would have left because I would have been spiritually dead had I stayed). But when they did the "shaking of hands" during a song the camera showed the crowd. I recognized many of them and all of them are in the senior citizen crowd. If they don't change things the church who helped shape who I am will surely die. The pastor has been there since 1971. I would guess they might have 10-12 kids in youth (I'll ask my dad but they certaintly have not grown any since 1991 and do not keep the new families that start to attend). I was married in that church in 1995 and it was starting to die then. I haven't been there since probably 99 or 2000. After watching their most recent service I see no need to ever go back. 

Sorry to get long winded but your situation (40 and younger crowd) isn't just your church. It is a problem across many churches in America. I know I for one have had as much "It Is Well With My Soul" as I can take. And it might be harder for you to "church shop" considering you are staff.... But I would suggest putting some feelers out and seeing if you can find somewhere else..... At least give it a shot... A church website can tell you a LOT about a church.. For example, the church we are members of now has a vibrant website with lots of interactive tools. It is MODERN... The church mentioned above that I grew up in has a website that looks like it was created on an old Tripod site in 1992. Very outdated and bland, much like the church itself. And if you can find a bigger, more vibrant church in your area they usually list job openings on their websites. Just by looking at a website you can say "Oh, I want to go there that's for me".

And not to make fun of church (that is why I am using generic photos), which one would YOU rather attend??

This church where everyone appears retirement age (with the exception of Mr Bean)


Or this one where everyone looks to be 40 and under?



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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Thu Dec 24, 2015 11:20 am

Lifestyle change you say? Hmmm, sounds hard, I really don't like change. But I would like to live to possibly see my great-grand children.

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Guilty/Forgiven

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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Wed Dec 30, 2015 7:10 pm

As I've said before, I had no choice to start a new diet as I was so sick I literally felt like I was dying. But looking back, it wasn't as difficult as it sounds. I chose New Years day 2010, and restocked the house with healthy alternatives and whole food breads, low or no sugar snacks, cut the deadly fast food, stopped all the junk eating and drinking.
It was huge !  I survived and am better now !
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Staybrite

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PostSubject: Re: Just feeling pretty low   Wed Dec 30, 2015 7:39 pm

I've spent the last few days eating low sugar and mostly "whole foods" (not much in the way of pre-packaged foods). Just had a fast food lunch today with a regular soda and feel horrible a few hours afterwards....you just might have something with this "low sugar lifestyle"

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