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 How many of you identify with this?

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Driven

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PostSubject: How many of you identify with this?   Thu Feb 18, 2016 7:39 pm

I found this on Facebook this morning, and it's pretty much me. It's an article about what life is like as an extroverted/outgoing/social person who is fundamentally an introvert. I know alldat mentioned he feels the same, and I suspect most of us do.

http://www.annabash.com/blog/introvert

I mean, I love people… but I get tired of massive groups after a while, precisely because there's no depth. If I'm at any sort of party without any close friends (which is often), I usually zone out or just leave.
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alldatndensum
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PostSubject: Re: How many of you identify with this?   Thu Feb 18, 2016 8:31 pm

I have very few friends.  I would say I have more acquaintances than friends.  I like to be around people but often feel the need to get away from them.  I can be the life of the party if I am in a social gathering, but you will find me bouncing around from group to group as I never feel that I really fit in anywhere.

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Xid

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PostSubject: Re: How many of you identify with this?   Thu Feb 18, 2016 9:48 pm

alldatndensum wrote:
I have very few friends.  I would say I have more acquaintances than friends.  I like to be around people but often feel the need to get away from them.  I can be the life of the party if I am in a social gathering, but you will find me bouncing around from group to group as I never feel that I really fit in anywhere.
And "Bingo" was his name-o.  Me to a 'T'.
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xenonlion

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PostSubject: Re: How many of you identify with this?   Thu Feb 18, 2016 10:27 pm

I like being by myself a lot. Sometimes, I'll wanna be with people, but only small groups for short periods of time. Talking to people makes me nervous. I'm more comfortable with some people than others of course. I do talk, sometimes a lot or loudly, but I get tired pretty quickly.

I think it would be nice to fall asleep listening to people talk to each other. Maybe because I'm sleepy. I don't mind observing people.
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MikeInFla

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PostSubject: Re: How many of you identify with this?   Fri Feb 19, 2016 8:24 am

These days I prefer to hang with my wife and kids,  but in college I was a social butterfly who stayed surrounded by groups. In college I hated when my roommates went home for the weekends. I went home too a lot of the time but I hated when they left because 2 of them were twins and always went home together and the 3rd was a high school buddy of theirs. It became lonely on the weekends so most of the time i would go home, at least on Sunday if they were not there. Never liked alone time in the dorm. And in college I loved first dates, I found them exciting and invigorating... Many of them I never saw or spoke to again, some I dated off and on until I met my wife (I met her while we were students at UT). I had (and still do) a lot of self esteem. I don't care what others think about me and never did... It's funny because my wife made a comment about it to me. I had forgotten about how someone can say something negative and it not hurt my feelings, it just rolls off. My wife had pointed out that our oldest daughter is the same way. She said "I heard someone say something to her at school and she just doesn't care what people think, she is just like you" (my wife works at the school). I asked my daughter about it and she said "Yeah, so what I don't really care what anyone thinks" and i had that same attitude as well. 

Off to read the article now....
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Guilty/Forgiven

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PostSubject: Re: How many of you identify with this?   Fri Feb 19, 2016 9:48 am

Last time I had a "best friend" was back in '93... then he married and I was on my own. Never cared to seek another after that as I'm not a social butterfly (even though later I hooked up with a high school buddy who dragged me to a couple clubs -he ended up going home with 2 girls and I split cuz that wasn't my thing).  In 96 I met Lisa and we became best friends, and been that way ever since. Like others here, I cannot stand social settings, and I count the minutes until they're over. I absolutely hate having to be social.

I originally had wanted to be in the cults ministries and studied for years as well as spoke at seminars and to individual Jehovah's Witnesses and Mormons over the years, and though I could put on a social act, it was torturous on me. I've since reclused and pray that God can use me in other ways. And He does in His own way.
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MikeInFla

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PostSubject: Re: How many of you identify with this?   Fri Feb 19, 2016 10:48 am

Guilty/Forgiven wrote:
Last time I had a "best friend" was back in '93... then he married and I was on my own. Never cared to seek another after that as I'm not a social butterfly (even though later I hooked up with a high school buddy who dragged me to a couple clubs -he ended up going home with 2 girls and I split cuz that wasn't my thing).  In 96 I met Lisa and we became best friends, and been that way ever since. Like others here, I cannot stand social settings, and I count the minutes until they're over. I absolutely hate having to be social.

I originally had wanted to be in the cults ministries and studied for years as well as spoke at seminars and to individual Jehovah's Witnesses and Mormons over the years, and though I could put on a social act, it was torturous on me. I've since reclused and pray that God can use me in other ways. And He does in His own way.
I have several pretty close friends at work and talk to them quite a bit. However, looking back at previous jobs I talk to none of my previous coworkers at all and considered them great friends at the time. As for high school friends I only hear from 2 of them on a regular basis and that is usually by text about once a month but almost daily during college football season. I had one childhood friend that I met in 1980 when I moved to Tennessee. We lost touch around 1996 because I got married and moved but his soon to be wife was from the small town we moved to (Cookeville, TN) so I would occasionally see him at the small mall there. Then we moved again twice and lost touch until his dad passed away. My mom called me because she saw the obit in the paper. This was 2003. So I called him out of the blue and had not spoken to him since around 1996. We renewed our friendship and spoke on the phone almost every day. He was like a brother to me. He and his family drove down to Panama City for vacation and we met them one evening for dinner (they were here with extended family). It was like no time had passed. We continued to talk on the phone sometimes 3-4 times a day. He was killed in a car accident on Thanksgiving 2013. Since that time I really haven't had a close buddy. I miss my friend. 

Even relatives are bad about staying in touch (like cousins and such). Since I am not on Facebook I never hear from them. If I e-mail them they might reply once and never again. 

So as for "old friends" I can say I have 2, both from my high school that I still hear from once a month. The rest of my high school friends have all moved away and are bad about responding to e-mail or even text message so I pretty much took a hint they don't wanna talk.

I love to be in crowds and at large functions but right now my 3 best friends live in my house and i am OK with that Smile My "guy" friends are all from work and i hear from them every day, even on off days. We do hang out some but all of us have kids and spend a lot of time at our own homes.


Last edited by MikeInFla on Fri Feb 19, 2016 2:35 pm; edited 1 time in total
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messiaen77

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PostSubject: Re: How many of you identify with this?   Fri Feb 19, 2016 11:03 am

Not me.  I'm more of a one-on-one kinda guy.  The general public annoys me too much to want to be out among them too often.  I do have a stage persona I can put on when I need to do the social thing, but I'd much rather be alone with the voices in my head.
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ishmael81

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PostSubject: Re: How many of you identify with this?   Fri Feb 19, 2016 3:06 pm

I guess I'm the odd man out here (that's a shocker...). I have two guys that I'm super-tight with (although they have other guys they're closer with than me) and several friends. I enjoy being in a group setting but I also believe in moderation - I also need time with my wife and son (both together as a family and individually - actually having a Dude Night tonight with my son), as well as needing time alone to pray, study the Bible and pursue hobbies.
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Staybrite

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PostSubject: Re: How many of you identify with this?   Fri Feb 19, 2016 3:11 pm

I love talking to people, but I hate people.  When I am at a group it takes me a while to get warmed up, but when I get going people usually can't get me to shut up.

Oddly my ideal day would be staying at home and reading a book.  I used to love it when the kids were younger and my wife would fly them down to see her mother for a few days.  I would get the entire house to myself and just lounge around and read.

Having said all that I hate (absolutely loath) large crowds.  Something about large groups of people makes them behave rudely and I cannot stand that.  I have felt inclined to seriously hurt people just over the behavior I see them exhibit in crowds.

I also do not have any seriously close friends that I get to talk to on a regular basis. I have an old college buddy that I have grown apart from, and an old middle/highschool friend that I only get to see about once a year.

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alldatndensum
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PostSubject: Re: How many of you identify with this?   Fri Feb 19, 2016 4:32 pm

I don't have any close friends.  I haven't had anyone I would call a friend outside of you guys since I stopped playing in my old band back in 2003/2004.  To be honest, I long for a couple of guy friends that I can hang out with from time to time.  To be even more up front, I don't think I really know how to make friends and keep them.  I feel that I have been crowned as the king of surface relationships.

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Guilty/Forgiven

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PostSubject: Re: How many of you identify with this?   Sun Feb 21, 2016 9:26 pm

After reading all these posts, I've come to realize that I'm in great company :-)
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rockerVu2

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PostSubject: Re: How many of you identify with this?   Mon Feb 22, 2016 8:23 am

It all sounds very familiar to me.

It seems I'm the person who doesn't have friends.
Maybe there's something not good to me.

Others seem to be more cooler than I'm.
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Driven

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PostSubject: Re: How many of you identify with this?   Mon Feb 22, 2016 10:44 am

I had a feeling most of us would find ourselves in that article. I think that's one of the reasons why we're here.
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Through The Dark Radio

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PostSubject: Re: How many of you identify with this?   Mon Feb 22, 2016 11:51 am

I'm actually here for the cronuts.
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Guilty/Forgiven

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PostSubject: Re: How many of you identify with this?   Mon Feb 22, 2016 2:16 pm

Staybrite wrote:
I love talking to people, but I hate people. 

Sorry, but every time I read this, I crack up in laughter !  I know it's meant to be serious, but the way it reads is SO funny to me ! 

Laughing lol! Laughing lol! Laughing lol! Laughing lol! Laughing lol! Laughing lol! Laughing lol! Laughing lol!
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Staybrite

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PostSubject: Re: How many of you identify with this?   Mon Feb 22, 2016 4:03 pm

Guilty/Forgiven wrote:
Staybrite wrote:
I love talking to people, but I hate people. 

Sorry, but every time I read this, I crack up in laughter !  I know it's meant to be serious, but the way it reads is SO funny to me ! 

Laughing lol! Laughing lol! Laughing lol! Laughing lol! Laughing lol! Laughing lol! Laughing lol! Laughing lol!

Glad to be of some entertainment to you. geek

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