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 La Vida Loca

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Guilty/Forgiven

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PostSubject: La Vida Loca   Fri Oct 28, 2016 12:56 am

It is a crazy life. I think I'm learning to roll with it and just laugh.

Tonight my son dropped by. I thought "Wow, how cool, haven't seen him since a few weeks before my surgery - even though he lives 5 minutes from me, he never visits or asks how I'm doing", so I'm pretty excited to see him, until we realize why he came over.

Lemme prep this one a little - My son was dating a gal for over a couple years whom all of us loved very much and considered family already. He decided a few short months ago that he didn't want to be "tied down" and wanted to go back to his single days of swingin', drinkin' and partying.  He barely had but a few months of sewing his wild oats before he impregnated his current girlfriend (with whom he was not serious)

Ironic eh ?

So now he gets to grow up REAL fast... boy, he has NO clue how his life is about to change - sigh
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ishmael81

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PostSubject: Re: La Vida Loca   Fri Oct 28, 2016 8:44 am

But good news - you're about to be a pawpaw!
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Xid

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PostSubject: Re: La Vida Loca   Fri Oct 28, 2016 9:48 am

Crazy life indeed!
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kerrick

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PostSubject: Re: La Vida Loca   Fri Oct 28, 2016 11:29 am

Oh wow, I can't imagine all the different (and opposing) emotions you must be having!  Especially with all that you're already going through as it is.  I am sorry it's happening this way and not the "proper" way... but congratulations nonetheless Jim.
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Guilty/Forgiven

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PostSubject: Re: La Vida Loca   Fri Oct 28, 2016 10:14 pm

Nothing my kids do is the "proper way" it seems. Amazing how much you can raise them, give them a great "nurtured" childhood.... and then "nature" takes over as adults and they're just like their birth Dad.

But yeh, on the positive, I guess I'll have to figure out what I'm to be called. I hate "Grandpa" cuz that's for old farts... I'm gonna be 47 in a couple weeks - YOUNG !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I was thinking it'd be cool to be called "Pappy" - What d'ya think ?
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Xid

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PostSubject: Re: La Vida Loca   Fri Oct 28, 2016 10:25 pm

It won't matter.  Once they start calling you "Grandpa" it will be all right.

I was a Grandpa before I turned 40.
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Staybrite

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PostSubject: Re: La Vida Loca   Sat Oct 29, 2016 10:26 am

Your kids sound exactly like mine (sadly).  Your account reminds me of 2-1/2 years ago when the wife and I came home from vacation to find out that our 19 year old daughter was no longer engaged, her former fiance was a psychopath...and "surprise" she is three months pregnant..and not moving out any time soon.

As for the whole grandpa vs papa thing, my last name is German so the wife decided we should go the Oma & Opa route.  But like Xid said, once the little crumb snatcher is old enough to start calling you Oldpa or pawpaw (or whatever) it won't matter because it will just melt your heart.

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alldatndensum
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PostSubject: Re: La Vida Loca   Sat Oct 29, 2016 9:00 pm

Since we have never been blessed with children, I will never know the true joys of being a grandpa.  I'd be the coolest one ever.  I know I would.

A girl from our previous church's youth group has recently come back into our lives at our current church.  She has two kids 2 years and under.  They are calling us Mimi and Poppy.  So, we are spoiling them like proper grandparents should.  I love it!!!

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Xid

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PostSubject: Re: La Vida Loca   Sat Oct 29, 2016 9:41 pm

alldatndensum wrote:
Since we have never been blessed with children, I will never know the true joys of being a grandpa.  I'd be the coolest one ever.  I know I would.

A girl from our previous church's youth group has recently come back into our lives at our current church.  She has two kids 2 years and under.  They are calling us Mimi and Poppy.  So, we are spoiling them like proper grandparents should.  I love it!!!
Nice!
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Guilty/Forgiven

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PostSubject: Re: La Vida Loca   Sun Oct 30, 2016 3:42 pm

All very cool  Thumbs Up

I ain't worried, concerned, mad, sad or whatever... matter of fact I have no emotion at this point. I know God will take care of everything - I just hope we don't get stuck raising the little stinker
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alldatndensum
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PostSubject: Re: La Vida Loca   Sun Oct 30, 2016 9:50 pm

This will be one of those times when you will have to use some tough love to try to train the young man to step up as a dad.  If you raise the kid, then you will teach him nothing.  Also, how are you going to chase after a baby in your degraded spinal condition?  You will do the child or your son any good by trying to take care of his responsibilities.

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ishmael81

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PostSubject: Re: La Vida Loca   Mon Oct 31, 2016 10:38 am

alldatndensum wrote:
Since we have never been blessed with children, I will never know the true joys of being a grandpa.  I'd be the coolest one ever.  I know I would.

A girl from our previous church's youth group has recently come back into our lives at our current church.  She has two kids 2 years and under.  They are calling us Mimi and Poppy.  So, we are spoiling them like proper grandparents should.  I love it!!!

A former pastor of ours was in a similar situation. He didn't get married until he was in his 40's.

One day he was talking about never having kids and so forth and one of us said "You may not have any kids living with you or that call you dad, but by being a pastor for almost 30 years now, you have a ton of spiritual children." We all just kind of sat there and thought about how true that was.
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alldatndensum
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PostSubject: Re: La Vida Loca   Mon Oct 31, 2016 9:09 pm

ishmael81 wrote:
alldatndensum wrote:
Since we have never been blessed with children, I will never know the true joys of being a grandpa.  I'd be the coolest one ever.  I know I would.

A girl from our previous church's youth group has recently come back into our lives at our current church.  She has two kids 2 years and under.  They are calling us Mimi and Poppy.  So, we are spoiling them like proper grandparents should.  I love it!!!

A former pastor of ours was in a similar situation. He didn't get married until he was in his 40's.

One day he was talking about never having kids and so forth and one of us said "You may not have any kids living with you or that call you dad, but by being a pastor for almost 30 years now, you have a ton of spiritual children." We all just kind of sat there and thought about how true that was.


While that may be true in some ways, it is also a half-hearted cliche that I have heard over and over.  It also does nothing to comfort a woman that has desired her own flesh and blood children but cannot seem to have them.  We've heard it so many times that it gets old.  No one considers that not having kids carries a lot of pain for people who were never able to have them like so many others.  While I think that most people mean well, from our side it comes off as spiteful at worst and insensitive at best.

I know you didn't know how I felt about that.  I just put it out there because I wanted everyone to know that some of us suffer inwardly because we have been denied the blessings that so many others have and often take for granted.  So, please do not apologize I don't feel that you meant any malice or ill will.  I simply wanted to tell how that statement makes me feel.

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ishmael81

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PostSubject: Re: La Vida Loca   Tue Nov 01, 2016 8:33 am

alldatndensum wrote:
ishmael81 wrote:
alldatndensum wrote:
Since we have never been blessed with children, I will never know the true joys of being a grandpa.  I'd be the coolest one ever.  I know I would.

A girl from our previous church's youth group has recently come back into our lives at our current church.  She has two kids 2 years and under.  They are calling us Mimi and Poppy.  So, we are spoiling them like proper grandparents should.  I love it!!!

A former pastor of ours was in a similar situation. He didn't get married until he was in his 40's.

One day he was talking about never having kids and so forth and one of us said "You may not have any kids living with you or that call you dad, but by being a pastor for almost 30 years now, you have a ton of spiritual children." We all just kind of sat there and thought about how true that was.


While that may be true in some ways, it is also a half-hearted cliche that I have heard over and over.  It also does nothing to comfort a woman that has desired her own flesh and blood children but cannot seem to have them.  We've heard it so many times that it gets old.  No one considers that not having kids carries a lot of pain for people who were never able to have them like so many others.  While I think that most people mean well, from our side it comes off as spiteful at worst and insensitive at best.

I know you didn't know how I felt about that.  I just put it out there because I wanted everyone to know that some of us suffer inwardly because we have been denied the blessings that so many others have and often take for granted.  So, please do not apologize I don't feel that you meant any malice or ill will.  I simply wanted to tell how that statement makes me feel.


I had never thought about it from that angle but it makes sense. Our son is adopted and we love him as our own (because he is) but there is still that longing in my wife to conceive and carry a baby.

I'm glad you know I meant no ill will as I certainly was not trying to be insensitive.
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